kknots's game Reviews on Newgrounds

[Civilization IV]

Beautiful piece of crap

The title says "civilization IV", but no one said that it is the game itself, it can be anything related to civilization 4.

"Oh you have probably done a shitload of work to get this working in flash, and the song is from Civilization 4, and every single detail of the techtree is accurately implemented. I see you also drawn the rotating Earth yourself, as a contribution to Civ4. 3D graphics are beautiful, maps are looking awesome and the campaign is more interesting in flash form than in original C++ form. I wonder how is it even pOsSIblE tO..."+GET SMart ENOUGH TO UPLOAD SUCH a HORRIFYING PIECE OF SHIT ON NEWGROUNDS. Prepare for your deadly summary:

+100 because it is about civilization 4;
-10 because it is fake;
-10 because there's a stupid loop instead of "new game";
-10 because there's the trollguy in the loop saying "I'm sorry for real";
-10 because you didn't say a word about civilization 4 original creators in the "About" menu button;
-10 because you lie Newgrounds is not sponsoring this;
-10 because this flash doesn't require Flash 10 or even Flash 8 to run properly;
-10 because this is blasphemy towards all civilization games;
-10 because the main screen is looking absolutely different compared to original civilization 4 main screen, you fail to even phish the game;
-10 because there are 3 save slots. In original Civ there are unlimited slots and that load things entirely looks different;
+1 because you did actually put some effort to draw that shitty stuff;
-11 because civilization 4 is far too great to be ran down by this scummy stuff, if you would run down something else then it would be fine;
and
-1000000 because I don't like the joke.

I hope. If I could give this submission a rating of -1 000 000, then I certainly would.
Even if I could rate minus million only once in entire life, I would gladly spend that chance on this submission. Is this a troll-flash? It failed to troll me 100 %.

Lare responds:

You probably spent more time writing this review than I did making this flash. So troll successful!

[BeatStreak 3000]

Not a challenge

I've played through 20 levels, made a few mistakes.
But you made the game in some places too easy: enemy paper, rock and scissors have different colors, making it recognizable by not even looking at it.
The graphics are a bit weird. I didn't believe that rock was a rock, paper paper and so on. It more looked like this: at first time paper looked like a rotating piece of DNA. Rock looked like snowball, composed of little pieces of paper, and scissors were so ugly that I couldn't even tell what that was.

Following rhythm was impossible. All songs were absolutely different from each other, and I can't tell how you assigned the 3 lines and types of enemies under voices of the songs. The game is a lot easier to play with sound turned off. Really. That way this is more of a Defense game.

May be make hotkeys? Because I tired of pressing everything with mouse at around level 11. You could use QWE,ASD,ZXC keys for corresponding lines and corresponding items. Probably worth an update for future players.

What about bosses? Some kind of special boss arena with all lines merged into on. And boss is, like, a figure composed of enemies that rotate. And you'd need to hit right enemies with right things.
You could also make different types of enemies have different speed! For example rock would go faster than everything else. Then it'd take more precision to launch the correct thing. That would ruin your idea with rhythm, though.

As far as I can see, some player got 6 times more score than me. I guess the problem lies within the Streak bar, which purpose is totally unknown to me, sorry. But those people somehow managed to figure it out.

Overall, there's too little art (mostly blue highlighted text, which is not art), and the idea is self-exclusive. You named the player's side "Shield". That means he has to defend. Rhythm is hard to follow. Then it's not rhythm, it is a defense game. But that's just me.

Warnockworld responds:

Hotkeys are already in the game, you can use qwe, asd, zxc, or numpad as short cuts.